Right
Behind You
By
Gail Giles
Right
Behind You
is an emotional examination of guilt, resilience, and how we define
ourselves. When Kip was nine years old
he threw gasoline on his seven-year-old next door neighbor and set him on fire. The other boys dies and Kip is sent to an
institution for juvenile’s who are violently mentally ill.
Kip/Wade spends years
punishing himself. He is convinced that
he is a horrible person and in some ways it is hard to argue with that. The is a child murderer. This book acknowledges
the fact that no matter how much you want to you will never be able to leave
yourself behind. There is no such thing
as starting over. Guilt is not something
that you can “get over”. In this case
especially all that you can do is learn to live with it. It also explores the
idea that our guilt and feelings impacts the people around us.
I watched
a TedTalk by Bryan Stevenson about capital punishment and in it he
said something that has become a watershed statement for me. “You are more than the worst thing that you
have ever done.” Think about that He was specifically talking to and about men
and women who have been found guilty of terrible things. That is a powerful idea. We as people are so complicated that we are
never just one thing. We are never just
evil. There is always more to us. Right Behind You is a that one
statement in novel form.
Considering the
subject matter this book is surprisingly light and easy to read. There are horrible things that happen but
most of it happens “offscreen” so to speak.
I think that it could have been harder hitting if it had been a bit
grittier. This might have been a case of
“show don’t tell.”
I thought that the
idea of rehabilitation and self-forgiveness were very well done. Kip/Wade works
intensely for YEARS with various therapist and counselors. He put a lot of work into being a healthy
person and even at the end of the novel he isn’t magically cured. He is always going to carry the burden of
what he did.
I really thought that
his father and stepmother were remarkable characters. Their support and acceptance was probably
what kept Kip/Wade from wallowing in anger and self-pity. I wasn’t a fan of the love interest. I am not sure how much she added to the
story.
Kip/Wade makes
mistakes but he comes across a little too perfect sometimes. I think this might have to do with the fact
that he is so angry at himself that he has very little left over to lash out at
others. He has a period of rage and a
period of depression but since the book is written from the perspective of
years on you aren’t really hit with those emotions. He also adjusts to the outside world
astonishingly well. There is very little
time or preparation from living in the institution to going to school with
other school. He is wearing the wrong
clothes but other than that he He has very few difficulties.
If nothing else this
book gave me a lot to think about. It dared to ask some important
questions. Not only, “How could this
have happened?” but also, “What do we do now?”
From Goodreads:
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